I can’t help myself…..bad habits

We’ve talked heaps about Comparisonitis, the dangers of it and how it can cause your adrenal system to go haywire. If you don’t know what I’m talking about – check out the articles on the website, or scroll through my socials!

So whilst we get stuck in the mental shit storm (I’m going to make a t-shirt with that on it, one day) of comparisonitis, it is also so important to look at our habits, not just our thoughts that may be further taking us down the rabbit hole of feeling crapness. The physical things that we are doing.

And there are heaps. Heaps of habits that we create/adopt/seek out as a way of distracting us from what is actually staring us in the face, and that of which we are too afraid to actually work on! These habits can also rob us from the true essence of life. The stuff that makes life magical. The literal stopping to smell the roses.

Habits that I’m talking about include over use of phones, gaming, over-scheduling ourselves, hoarding, obsessive cleaning, over-eating, under-eating, over-exercising, under-exercising, projection (telling everyone else what is wrong with their lives, without actually doing the work on your own shit!), and the pity party habit.

Quite a harsh list when you read it, isn’t it? But it is all stuff we can work on.

Don’t try and tackle them all at once. Pinpoint one less than helpful habit that you’d like to get rid of and work on that. Because when we take away the noise, or the distraction, we are left with the rawness of what we need to face.

So phones – look at how much time you honestly spend on it. Is it productive, or is it scrolling from one app to the next – living a case of FOMO (fear of missing out)? Do you need to set a timer and not press ’15 more minutes’ when it comes up?

Hoarding – is your life and house so overwhelmed with stuff that you start each day having to tidy? Or has it got to the point that you don’t know where to start, so you don’t, and just live amongst the mess and chaos? What does that do for your mental wellbeing?

Do you punish yourself if you treat yourself to some cake? Do you think ‘fuck it – I’ve started I may as well finish the block of chocolate?’ What is the emotion really underneath it all?

Do you quickly tell others what is going on in their life (from your point of view)- but really it is just a way to speak about your own concerns that you’re struggling with? Is it time to look in the mirror?

Are you that person that has to be one up? So someone says they fall off a step and you respond with ‘I fell off and broke my ankle and sat on my hot cross bun?’ Are you feeling like you aren’t seen, by anyone? Do you want to feel included?

And what about the pity party. When people ask you how you are, do you vomit on them a tirade of wrongness that is panning out in your life? Or do you say to them ‘fine thanks’, when things really aren’t fine? What are you seeking or not seeking with this behaviour?

In all of these cases, and countless more that can be listed – we are all searching for and trying to have a need of ours met. We are human beings. And we have needs. The need to feel loved, included, to have a purpose and to feel wanted.

So instead of opting for that habit that gets you stuck down a pipe of time wasting – ask yourself ‘what is it that I actually want?’ Maybe it is a conversation – so ring a friend. Maybe you need to set some goals to work towards, instead of floundering (I’ve got an awesome program for that - Evoke Self!). Or maybe, just maybe you need to look in the mirror and tell yourself how fucking phenomenal you actually are. And what about sitting down and writing out everything that you have achieved, everything you already are, everything that is positive about you and your one precious life.

So people, go check out your habits – you’ll be amazed at how much time you are ‘wasting’ avoiding stuff that we always end up having to face anyway. So really – there is no time like the present.

Much love and Take Care

Arnna x